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I never considered myself a quitter. Usually, I finish what I have started: a 30 minutes high intensity workout after the Christmas holidays for example or the extended version of the third Lord of the Rings movie, also a bachelor program in environmental science and a master in marine science in Kiel. It’s not like it wasn’t painful sometimes, it’s not like I never had doubts – but somehow, I could always convince myself to keep going instead of giving up.

Not so with my PhD in coastal science. I started in 2020 and quit three years later – way before I crossed the finish line. This post is neither meant to justify why I ended my science career nor is it meant to encourage you to do the same. I rather want to share some life lessons that I have learned before, during and after quitting.

1. Quitting your PhD is not the same as giving up

It is a matter of phrasing: I’d rather say I “quit” my PhD instead of “giving it up”. Why? Well, saying I “gave up” gives a bad vibe, doesn’t it? It implies that I wasn’t capable of finishing – which I don’t think is true. Yes, sometimes I felt overwhelmed and not capable. But with the right motivation, focus, support, and more time, I am sure I could have managed. So, I prefer the term “quitting”. It means, that I made a conscious decision to leave this career path and find one that suits me better. Close one door, open another one – you know the game.

2. Making the right decisions is hard

Of course, the decision to quit wasn’t easy and is the result of a long and complex process of evaluating emotions, thoughts, conversations, facts and dreams. But when I finally made up my mind, It didn’t feel like a failure but like instant relief – as if I had made the right choice.

The hardest part was to communicate my “right choice” to others in the science community. Looking into puzzled faces, explaining why I no longer wanted to do the job they all love so much, justifying why I was “throwing it all away” although I had “already come so far” – all of that is tough. It makes you rethink everything over and over again, it makes you feel their disappointment and maybe even makes you doubt the decision, that felt so right before.

Of course, the decision to quit wasn’t easy and is the result of a long and complex process of evaluating emotions, thoughts, conversations, facts and dreams. But when I finally made up my mind, It didn’t feel like a failure but like instant relief – as if I had made the right choice.

The hardest part was to communicate my “right choice” to others in the science community. Looking into puzzled faces, explaining why I no longer wanted to do the job they all love so much, justifying why I was “throwing it all away” although I had “already come so far” – all of that is tough. It makes you rethink everything over and over again, it makes you feel their disappointment and maybe even makes you doubt the decision, that felt so right before.

Luckily, I have family and friends who don’t need any explanations or justifications but support me no matter what – a lesson I have already learned long ago but is always good to refresh.

3. Miss, don’t regret

Now – more than one year later – I still don’t regret leaving academia behind. I miss it, though. I miss learning about coastal science every day, I miss field surveys and research cruises, I miss discussions with colleagues and friends in the office (often not related to our science), miss moaning about our struggles together and empowering each other. I’m definitely a bit melancholic when I look back, but it doesn’t torment me, so it’s all good.

Drone surveying at Stohl cliff – some of the best days during my PhD.

4. You don’t need to know what you want, but what you don’t want

Some might think quitting doesn’t get you anywhere. I disagree. Especially when it comes to tough decisions (and deciding about your career definitely falls into that category), I’ve always been a fan of the process of elimination. It might be slow but it is still progress.

In my case, I realized that the kind of work I did during my PhD was not the kind of work that would fulfil and excite me in the long run. So, I eliminated it. After taking a step back I realized that writing about and communicating science was always what I enjoyed the most. Not knowing exactly what to do with this great discovery, I applied to become a journalist with the local newspaper. Pretty spontaneous, pretty bold choice- but I got the job. It’s totally different from what I did before, but turns out, the writing and human interaction bring me joy and excitement.

So, is that what I want to be now – a local newspaper journalist? Well, I don’t know yet. What I know is that my elimination process led me to a profession that works better for me. So, step by step, I am moving forward, enjoying the journey, and excited to see what’s next.

5. Motivation is key

Truth be told: I could have jumped to conclusions much earlier. Instead, I waited for years to be brave or desperate enough to decide to quit my doctoral journey.

Throwback: In 2018 I submitted my master’s thesis. 160 painful pages of geological interpretations of continental shelf data. After that draining experience, I told myself not to consider starting a dissertation, as it would be even more exhausting.

But one thing led to another, I got several offers that would naturally lead into a PhD and therefore a scientific career. Thus, motivated by the opportunity and the challenge, I took up one of them. What was missing in my motivational cocktail was the actual intention of becoming a scientist.

And that leads me straight to my advice for everyone, who starts a PhD of their own: Before you sign up for it, check your intrinsic motivation. If you want to become a scientist, a PhD is your way to go. If you start the dissertation for other reasons (you just like the subject, it’s a good first job after Uni, it helps you to stay in the country) that is totally fair, too. But then don’t lose yourself and don’t be afraid to let it go.

6. The power of vulnerability

One lesson I just learned recently is the “power of vulnerability”. With this concept, the American social scientist and speaker Brené Brown states that showing vulnerability and communicating failure and struggle is not a weakness. Instead, it leads to innovation, creativity and real connection. Also (and I am sure many of you agree with that) it takes a lot of courage to expose your insecurities and emotions in front of a superior instead of playing professional and pretending everything is going as planned – especially as a woman in a patriarchal system.

Man, I wish I had known about Brown’s work during my PhD. If I had shared more struggles and asked for help more, things might have gone very differently (better, I guess).

Of course, that concept of communication can only work if superiors are open for it. But it is not their responsibility to implement it, but ours. As a new generation of employees, I am sure we can change the way of communicating and connecting in a work environment by showing more honesty and struggles from time to time. Its powerful.

The end is not the end

As I come to the end, I would like to emphasise once again: I don’t want to persuade anyone to quit their PhD. But maybe reading this post will help you learn from my mistakes and reflect on your own career. If it leads you into science or out of it – that really doesn’t matter.

Tanita

Not A Doctor: Lessons I’ve learned from quitting my PhD

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Ocean Acidification

How Will IMPAA Impact Shipping Trade Routes?

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In recent months, U.S. trade has been at the forefront for many of us. But also, for many of us, when our packages show up at our door, we often forget the journey these items take, me included. When I began working on shipping emissions, I was astonished to learn that more than 90% of global trade moves via ocean transport. As you read this, there could be more than 50,000 ships crossing the ocean or loading/unloading at ports around the world. Shipping has a major role in our economy, but it also has an equally large impact on the air we breathe, our climate and the health of our ocean.

Ships often run on some of the dirtiest fuels to get them from point A to point B, and they continue burning those fuels when they are docked in our ports. Think of an idling truck waiting in a parking spot—the engine is still running, and the exhaust system is pushing out those dirty black fumes into the air. For the shipping sector, vessels spew an estimated 1 billion metric tons of greenhouse gases every year. These dirty fumes have a huge impact on our health, our ocean and our environment. This pollution causes an estimated 250,000 premature deaths and six million childhood asthma cases globally each year—disproportionately impacting portside communities, which are often overburdened economically. According to the EPA, 39 million people in the United States live close to a port. This means more than 39 million people are directly breathing air that leads to these respiratory diseases, cardiovascular issues and other health problems. But there are solutions to these problems, and we all have the power to push them forward.

One proposed solution is offered by the International Maritime Pollution Accountability Act (IMPAA), which was introduced in Congress last session by Representatives Doris Matsui (D-CA) and Kevin Mullin (D-CA) in the House and Senator Sheldon Whitehouse (D-RI) in the Senate. This bill empowers the EPA to levy pollution fees on large marine vessels offloading cargo at U.S. ports, including a $150-per-ton maritime carbon fee and fees for emission of nitrogen oxides, sulfur dioxides and fine particulate matter. In turn, if passed, this solution would raise an estimated $250 billion over 10 years that would provide critical funding—for instance, modernizing the Jones Act fleet, revitalizing U.S. shipbuilding, decarbonizing the maritime economy and addressing pollutants in port communities along our coasts and in the ocean. 

Shipping emissions

While there have been concerns about fees like this driving ships away from our ports, re-routing to countries like Canada and Mexico, and using trucks or rail to import goods, a new study commissioned by Ocean Conservancy examines this potential for mode shift, and the findings should ease concerns. In fact, findings indicate that in the case of IMPAA fees, the potential for ships to divert from U.S. ports is low for the majority of routes. Actually, most established routes remain economically and environmentally favorable despite these additional pollution fees. This is great news for our ports, our communities and the future of clean shipping in the U.S. With policies that work in tandem to limit emissions from ships (via the Clean Shipping Act) and charge vessels for their pollution, we can push shipping to a zero-emission future and the industry to greener practices.

We look forward to this important piece of legislation being reintroduced in this Congress. In the meantime, check out Ocean Conservancy’s action center and demand climate action that supports a clean-energy transition!

Read more from our new study here!

The post How Will IMPAA Impact Shipping Trade Routes? appeared first on Ocean Conservancy.

How Will IMPAA Impact Shipping Trade Routes?

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Ocean Acidification

The Latest Offshore Oil and Gas Policies that Threaten Our Ocean

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Offshore oil drilling is a dirty, risky endeavor.

The Deepwater Horizon disaster is perhaps the most dramatic example of how offshore drilling can go wrong. Fifteen years ago this month, the Deepwater Horizon oil rig exploded approximately 40 miles off the coast of Louisiana, taking the lives of 11 oil workers and causing the release of an estimated 210 million gallons of oil into the ocean.

Even when offshore oil operations go as planned, they harm our ocean by causing chronic water and air pollution, littering the seafloor with disused pipelines, and contributing to harmful emissions that worsen the impacts of climate change.

Despite these well-known risks and dangers, the administration and pro-oil members of Congress are moving swiftly to open more areas of our ocean to offshore drilling and remove regulations and policies that protect marine life, promote safety and discourage harmful greenhouse gas emissions.

Between the speed and and volume of actions the administration has taken, it can be easy to miss the threats on offshore oil and gas drilling specifically. Let’s break it down:

On day one of his second term, President Trump moved to open vast areas of our ocean to offshore oil and gas leasing and drilling. President Trump signed two executive orders that purported to open huge swaths of our ocean to offshore oil and gas leasing, including waters off the Atlantic and Pacific coasts, in the Northern Bering Sea, and in the Beaufort and Chukchi seas of the Arctic Ocean. Previous presidents had placed these areas off-limits to oil and gas leasing, and it is not clear whether the administration has the legal authority to rescind those protections.

Following this executive action, the new Secretary of the Interior issued orders that set the stage for a series of pro-oil policy and regulatory changes. Shortly after assuming office, Secretary of the Interior Doug Burgum issued a Secretarial Order requiring agencies under his authority to develop plans to “suspend, revise, or rescind” key programs, regulations and policies. The Secretarial Order puts in jeopardy policies designed to reduce risk to marine life, decrease the government’s exposure to financial risk and increase the safety of offshore operations, including:

  • Permits that require mitigation measures designed to protect threatened and endangered species in waters where most offshore oil and gas activity takes place.
  • Regulations that help ensure the owners of offshore oil and gas leases have the financial resources necessary to clean up their equipment after they finish their oil and gas operations.
  • Safety regulations designed to minimize the risk of dangerous blowouts and other “loss of well control” incidents.
  • The current nationwide five-year offshore leasing program that limits potential new offshore oil and gas leasing to just three lease sales between 2024 and 2029—a record low number.

Pro-oil members of Congress are also taking or considering steps to encourage and expedite offshore drilling. Because of the filibuster, a 60-vote supermajority is required to pass most legislation in the U.S. Senate. However, certain types of legislation—including the budget reconciliation process and legislation passed under the Congressional Review Act—require only a bare majority for passage. Pro-oil members of Congress are taking advantage of these special legislative processes to attempt to push through legislation that favors offshore drilling.

Offshore drilling

  • Members of Congress have discussed using the budget reconciliation process to pass legislation that would require the government to hold new offshore oil and gas lease sales in specific areas of the ocean. If existing executive-branch safeguards conflict with future legislatively mandated offshore oil and gas lease sales, the legislatively mandated lease sales would likely prevail. 
  • Under the Congressional Review Act, the House and Senate  passed legislation to undo a regulation that imposed a fee on emission of methane—a powerful greenhouse gas—from oil and gas production facilities, including some offshore facilities. They also passed legislation to repeal Department of the Interior regulations designed to better protect archaeological resources from impacts caused by offshore oil and gas drilling. President Trump signed both bills into law in mid-March.

These actions represent real threats to our ocean, the people and marine life that depend on it and on our global climate.

At Ocean Conservancy, we actively oppose these short-sighted and dangerous attempts to expand offshore oil drilling, remove environmental protections and reduce safety standards. The United States and the world must move away from risky and dangerous offshore drilling and toward 100% clean-ocean energy. We will continue to work with our partners, members and supporters to accelerate the phase-out of offshore oil and gas, advance responsible offshore wind and other marine renewable energy, address the root causes of climate change, and protect our ocean and the people and marine life that depend on it. Take action with Ocean Conservancy and join the movement to protect our ocean, forever and for everyone.

The post The Latest Offshore Oil and Gas Policies that Threaten Our Ocean appeared first on Ocean Conservancy.

The Latest Offshore Oil and Gas Policies that Threaten Our Ocean

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Ocean Acidification

Master of Disguise: The Decorator Crab

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Imagine yourself snorkeling through a lush kelp forest off the coast of Southern California. Sunlight filters through the dense canopy of the forest, casting shimmering patterns on the rocky seafloor below. The underwater world appears peaceful and still—until your gaze falls on what seems to be an ordinary-looking rock.

Then… the rock moves.

At first, you assume it’s just the ocean’s current shifting the rock. But as you take a closer look, you realize it’s not a rock at all. It seems to be a crab, expertly hidden with bits of algae from its surroundings. Meet the decorator crab: a master of disguise and possibly the most stylish and secretive crab in our ocean.

What are decorator crabs?

Decorator crabs constitute several species of crabs that belong to the superfamily Majoidea, a group of crustaceans with a remarkable talent for camouflage. They use tiny, hook-like structures on their shells to attach pieces of algae, seaweed and other marine debris onto their bodies. But this isn’t just a quirky fashion statement—these natural accessories help decorator crabs avoid predators, like pacific halibut, octopuses and sea otters, by blending in with their surrounds. 

If they move to a new environment, decorator crabs will adapt their wardrobe to match. Some take their disguises a step further, attaching living organisms like sponges and venomous anemones to their carapaces—the hard upper shell that protects the crab’s vital organs. This not only helps the crabs blend in but also offers an extra layer of defense. Even when they shed their exoskeleton in a process called molting, some crabs will carefully transfer their decorations to their fresh shell.

Decorator Crab

You can also identify decorator crabs because they are decapods, meaning they have ten legs—two pinchers for feeding and four additional pairs of legs for walking. Decorator crabs are primarily omnivores and use their pinchers to pluck small algae out of crevices and off the sea floor. 

Decorator crabs are solitary animals for most of the year outside of mating season from May to September. You’ll find decorator crabs in shallow coastal waters around the world, from coral reefs and rocky shorelines to kelp forests, seagrass beds and tidal pools. You may have to keep a close eye out for decorator crabs, though, as their average size is only three to five inches across their leg span.

How can you help decorator crabs?

While decorator crabs aren’t currently endangered, they depend on a thriving ocean to survive. Like all marine life, they face threats from pollution, habitat destruction and climate change. Protecting our ocean means protecting creatures like them.

Ocean Conservancy is dedicated to safeguarding our ocean from today’s greatest challenges, from plastic pollution to climate change. But we can’t do it alone. Visit the Ocean Conservancy Action Center to learn how you can help defend our ocean, its wildlife and the communities that depend on it.

The post Master of Disguise: The Decorator Crab appeared first on Ocean Conservancy.

Master of Disguise: The Decorator Crab

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